Friday, April 4, 2008


Just when I was feeling disappointed, let down, and forgotten by a group of good friends who I, admittedly, have not kept in good touch with in the past couple months, I've had a good phone chat with 2 of my best friends and got an email from my sister-in-law (the nice one! the one I enjoy hearing from! the one who doesn't make me want to stab myself in the eyeballz!) that made me really excited for the beach AND for my upcoming party... and really, I feel so much better.

Even though I do feel better, I feel like writing about what really upset me last week. I heard back from the previously mentioned group of friends about my party and they basically told me that they wouldn't be able to make it because that day is Emily's bachelorette party... and by the way, I'm invited. Gee, thanks? Sometimes I get tired of being there for everyone else's special occasions. I finally decided to step up and mention that the party was on my birthday-- something I've refused to do in the past, but have also realized that the people whose birthdays I usually help celebrate almost always organize their own get together. So I finally did it, and got shot down. And when I suggested an earlier time in the day, like noon? Well, that won't work either. And by the way, they're all pretty much busy all of June. OK, then:)

As bitchy as it may sound, I really do not care to spend my birthday celebrating someone else's bachelorette party, especially when I already feel like an afterthought and don't really enjoy "going out" these days anyway (OK, I haven't enjoyed "going out"-- as in, going to 3 different bars, paying a cover, and walking all over the place in uncomfortable shoes-- since college). I would much rather be with my family and closest friends, sitting outside on a deck or nestled in a cozy booth at a restaurant with a few people who make my life happy.

Andrea and I always say how birthdays are one of those things that we don't want a big deal made out of-- because that's awkward and not really our thing, but at the same time if no one remembers our day, it would be sad and pretty sucky. So in the end, birthdays end up being wierd and awkward.

So I'm trying to just get over it. Summers are really busy and I know they wouldn't purposely try to hurt my feelings. I was extremely emotional last week (turns out I do PMS!) and probably blew it out of proportion. I just wish it wasn't so hard to keep in touch with friends. I hate being the one who lives far away.

1 comment:

Lisa said...

I dont think you blew anything out of proportion my dear! You are right, you are the one who is always there, special occasion or not, just because someone needs, wants, kinda hints at something! Thats what makes you the beautiful person you are, inside and out. Well that and those eyes, I mean seriously, who has eyes that gorgeous, come on...!!!!! Please remember how much you are loved!